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Cheating, Relationships, What To Do About It?

By Sally Dunwell

Relationships and cheating go together all the time it seems. Perhaps your friend is miserable because he has had someone cheat on him. Maybe you are the one that has been cheated on. Or, was it you that was doing the cheating?

Cheating is a painful business. It definitely hurts the person who has been cheated on, the betrayal of trust; and also it hurts the cheater. The cheater has to hide what he is doing, he has to lie about his behaviors, and he has to feel the guilt that inevitably accompanies cheating.

Even if he or she doesn't seem guilty, they probably secret feel guilty. When there are relationships and cheating occurs, that doesn't mean the end of the relationship every time.

You've been in a relationship and you've been cheated on, and you've gotten back together or you've never broken up. Can you really make it work now that the other person has cheated? How do you get over it? Will he cheat again?

Saving relationships where there has been cheating going on, especially if cheating has happened more than once, well, it is not easy. But if you can rebuild your trust in the other person, then you can stay together, and make a happy relationship.

Why did the person cheat on you? It is very important to think about this, because this may indicate whether you will be able to trust them not to cheat on you again. How were things in your relationship, where they not too good, or was it just convenient or one of those things that "just happened"? You will need to have calm conversations about these reasons.

If boredom and opportunity came together and the person just decided to cheat, then you have some problems. They cannot give you any better reason than that, you may want to consider that what they did was unforgiveable. It is not an easy choice.

If your relationship was in a difficult state, the other person may have thought it was going to end anyway. If they felt undervalued, or ignored, this could have lead to them cheating. I am not saying they were right - there is no excuse. But thinking about these problems and understanding them may help you to be able to work on the issues together.

Relationships and cheating are strange in a way, some couples are able to move on and get over the destruction of trust involved in an affair. More often though, the person cheated on cannot get over it. If there is no trust and there is a definite fear that the person will cheat again, - this is a soul-destroying thing to do.

Being constantly suspicious will make you so unhappy, and will make the other person feel under the microscope all the time. You have to decide that you are going to trust the other person and make yourself do that, even though is a difficult thing to do especially in the relationships and cheating situation. If you are concerned that your partner is cheating maybe not for the first time, then you need to do something about it to put your own mind at rest.

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